Business Logic

Father: I want you to marry a girl of my choice

Son: "I will choose my own bride!"

Father: "But the girl is Bill Gate's daughter."

Son: "Well, in that case...ok"

Next Father approaches Bill Gates.

Father: "I have a husband for your daughter."

Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!"

Father: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."

Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case...ok"

Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.

Father: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-President."

President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"

Father: "But this young man is Bill Gate's son-in-law."

President: "Ah, in that case...ok"

Morale of the Story: Even If you have nothing, You can get Anything. But your attitude should be positive.

Your Age & Your Sex Life!!

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have sex -(choose a number 1 to 9 only)!

2. Multiply this number by 2

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1757. If you haven't, add 1756.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born

You should have a three digit number. The first digit of this was your original number ( I. e., how many times you want to do it each week.)

The next two numbers are YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is!!!!!)

Japanese Group Prank

I cannot imagine this bunch of Japanese so gung-ho all out pulling tricks on others...

The Divorce Note

Dear Wife:
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forgood. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell.

Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers later that night.

You came home, nibbled at your food for two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't want sex anymore or anything. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me. Whichever is the case..... I'm gone.

Signed,
Your EX-Husband

P.S. Don't try to find me. Your sister and I are moving away to West Virginia together. Have a great life!

------------ --------- --------- --------- ---------

Dear Ex-Husband:
Nothing has made my day more enjoyable than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a 'goodman' is a far cry from what you've been.

I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping. It's just too bad it doesn't work. Yes, I did notice when you got a hair cut last week and actually the first thing that came to my mind was "You look just like a girl" but my mother raised me not to say anything at all if you can't say anything nice.

And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with my SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.I turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers on because the price tag was still on them. I prayed that it was just a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your silk boxers were $49.99.

After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for twenty million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Hawaii. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you've always wanted. My lawyer said with the letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed,
Rich As Hell and Freeeeeeeeeeee!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my sister 'Carla'...was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem for you.

Sprite Latest Advertisement

Life as a IT Support Part 2

Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just doesn't work. What am I doing wrong?

Tech support: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive, right?

Customer: Yeah.

Tech support: And what sort of computer are you using?

Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises. Listen.....

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?

Female customer: A white one.

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.

Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?

Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.

Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.

Customer: No... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry...

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the left of the screen.

Customer: Your left or my left?

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?

Male Customer: Hello... I can't print.

Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and...

Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, damn it!

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: I have problems printing in red...

Tech support: Do you have a color printer?

Customer: Aaaah.................... thank you.

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?

Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.

Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?

Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.

Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.

Customer: OK

Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?

Customer: Yes

Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?

Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.

Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: I can't get on the Internet.

Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?

Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?

Customer: Five stars.

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?

Customer: Netscape.

Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.

Customer: Oh, sorry... Internet Explorer.

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: How may I help you?

Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.

Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?

Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.

Tech support: Are you running it under windows?

Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."

Tech support: Ma Foo Lat!! $%#&*%#$#%!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."

Customer: I don't have a P.

Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.

Customer: What do you mean?

Tech support: "P"... on your keyboard, Bob.

Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!!

This is how ATM should be

Weird Scenarios

This was actually on TV. The commentators paused and didn't say a word...


Arkansas Razorback players Clarke Moore, Brett Goode and Casey Dick need to stop hanging out on the sidelines!


How to irk your neighbour


One happy family...


What do kids study in school nowadays..


Why would one need to wear pyjamas when they go to sleep.


Latest tattoo


The picture says it all

The Daily Life of an IT Support

Life as an IT Support ain't that privilege at all compared 5 or maybe 10 years ago. Nowadays, IT supports will have to endure all sort of stress and activities such as Yoga, meditation, relaxology and most of all many supplements to take in order to maintain their sanity well-being; both physically and mentally.

Let me give you some examples what IT Support staffs need to endure...











So, people!! Please do have mercy on your IT Support staffs in your office. Do not make yourself dumb but acted smarter than them. Amen!!

My Colleague's Girl Friend!!

I always suspicious this colleague of mine whom always shy away when people ask him about his girlfriend. One fine day, I stumbled into both of them when he work as a volunteer at a concert backstage!!

I could not believe how beautiful his girlfriend is....





"Woi!!! Jason Mok", I yelled.


Jeng, jeng, jeng....


































"Hai!! My name is Leng Lui Jane!!"

Something to perk you up!!

Hi guys,
sorry for the long absent. been away very busy now due to some stupid projects my beloved boss bestowed to me. I know he purposely one since he knew i can do my job well. Since the company is paying my salary, so got to do loh...

Ok guys... something to really make u laugh lah... enjoy! if u dun laugh after watching this, pls dun cum back n look for the nearest bridge or monsoon drain n drown urself since there is really no hope for u to live as a human. Better b as coarpse!!